Tuesday, October 04, 2005

I come from a long line of huge families. But I had to admit I felt a lot of trepidation about dealing with a second baby in our midst.
The new life began with Francesca Grace on the 5th May 2005 (05/05/05!) She was born by caesarean again at Royal Women’s Hospital. This time everything went perfectly and a huge thanks to the doctors and midwives for a safe and smooth delivery.
It was again a big relief to have her out and safely in my arms. She is such an exquisite creature- placid sleepy and cuddly- I got the proverbial ‘good baby’.
The first few months were hectic. I was still doing all the editing of the book with Sandy Webster from Penguin. It was a marathon job with a new baby and slightly disgruntled three year old. In fact Raf turned three in the middle of it all and we even managed a party and rocket ship cake.
When it all goes pear shaped and Raf needs attention I just pop her in the Baby Bjorn and she goes off to sleep. ( Couldn’t live without this piece of equipment.)

I would like to try to convey some of the more lyrical or thoughtful notions and feelings but life is so busy it is hard to harness language into something that could convey everything that is going on. The publicity for the book has been keeping me busy. It’s chaos some hours, calm others. It’s hard to stop the house looking like a bomb site. Baby time, Raf time, washing, shopping, cooking time. Just life really. Francesca (or Frankie after my Grandma Frankie Gorman) is now 5 months old and still a very good baby, resilient, forgiving...a sleeper!
And still no matter how difficult it gets some hours, I hold onto that enormous gratitude of having them both in my life. And having a daughter to raise after losing Layla. Life is full and rich, and boring and repetitive, joyful, frustrating, exhausting and full of laughter and tears. Everything really.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Excuse me... I think I just blogged

So I’m about to blog.

Funny term that. Sounds like something you might do down a toilet. A fart in cyberspace. The bodily waste of private lives and opinions laid bare for public consumption. ‘A new blog is born every second’ trumpets the Guardian newspaper. They report the blog tracking site Technorati calculated that about 80,000 new weblogs were being created each day.
Hardcore bloggers probably don’t need to waste time with friendships. ‘Log on to my blog’ they can say, ‘you’ll find out anything you want to know about my life.’ (Perhaps more than they ever wanted to know.)

‘If you know somebody,’ says blog consultant Adriana Cronin-Lukas, ‘how long does it take to know what they are thinking?It’s a long drawn out process. But with blogs it’s the other way around- you meet the person’s mind through their blog.’

So I’m about to blog.

Hell, obviously everyone’s doing it. Shaking their booty in the wild west of the web. May as well join the fray. See where the frontier opens, what it opens to. Face the injuns that shoot their arrows along the way. Provide an online whorehouse or saloon. But there I am taking the analogy too far. Yes, a blogger has no editor to curb their excess. It’s a shoot from the hip kind of venture.

‘You need a blog so people have a reason to keep coming back to your site’ Kerry my web producer tells me. But what to tell you? Jump on my soap box? Cut and copy my private journal? Bore you with the domestic details of my life? (Excess of shitty nappies today...) Or just shoot the breeze....

No-one is boring if they tell the truth said Quentin Crisp. You must be prepared to tell all your secrets -and everyone else’s as well adds Raymond Carver.

So I guess I’ll just start posting and see where my mind takes me. Oh dear.....excuse me...I think I just blogged....